Cold shoulder...just another topsy turvy top and I'm waaaay over it!
I was recently speaking with a retail manager about my thoughts on the origin of the cold shoulder. In my opinion, it's just a mini "neck hole" that travels and changes shapes with each movement. First it travels to the shoulders, to form slits or holes for the style that I'm turning my back on daily. Once it leaves the shoulder, it takes the form of a key hole in the chest, then breaks apart creating two holes on the side. Merging together once again, it takes on the shape of a back keyhole or widens for a complete backless style. Then, the rotation around the neck is complete!
Cold shoulder...just another topsy turvy top and I'm waaaay over it!
I have a thing for denim; especially designer brands. If I could purchase a new pair everyday of the year, I would but unfortunately my bank account won't allow it. But...there's always the thrift store and on occasion I'm lucky enough to find a pair in my size for pennies compared to the actual retail price. And...I have to wash my thrifted denim within 24 hours of purchase. Why? "Cause I buy them to wear 'em!
Okay, so my addiction to denim is not so weird, but my issue with cuffed denim might make you go...hmmh?
Whenever I see a pair that I like, I can't help but cuff 'em right there in the store. Strange, right? I think certain styles look so much better cuffed, so I just can't help myself. Then, there's the issue with pre-cuffed denim. If they are wide-legged with a cuff, that's perfectly fine, but pre-cuffed skinnies and capris...that's just not gonna work!
Why? Because it's like getting help with tying my shoes. I'm a big girl and I can do it on my own!
So...when I thrifted a pair of pre-cuffed capri pants by New York & Company (I know they are not high-end, but they're not Walmart either), I cut the stitches and un-cuffed them. That's right! I sure did!
And after washing and drying them, I re-cuffed them and the end result was almost identical to manufactured look. But at least I did it myself.
And another thing about denim, I really don't like denim with white stitching, unless I'm planning to wear a white tee and white shoes....
Like that'll ever happen!
My obsession with denim...I can think of much worse things that I could be addicted to!
When I recently received a media invite for a fashion show in Atlanta, the initial excitement was more about the trip than the actual destination. After reading 'What's new for Fall 2017" in the body of the message and realizing that it was the same styles and colors that I've been seeing year after year, the little flame for fashion was snuffed out!
Remember when the fashion angels stirred the waters of blogging and everyone, including me, jumped in? Five years later, I'm feeling like such a fake which means that I should drop the "style blogger" title like a counterfeit bag, right?
It's being going on for a while now, my waning interest in fashion. I tried to re-kindle the flame by following other style bloggers, but it just wasn't enough to get me into the groove again. After a couple of postings, they all start to look alike and those gosh-awful tutorials with the "Heeey Girls" are worse on my nerves than fingernails scraping a chalkboard. Once I took a deeper look within, I found that I have no desire to sit front row alongside style mavens with their popsicle sticks crossed in unison. And the more I think about it, the runway is more for shock factor than anything else and I get more than enough of that on the streets. Honestly, I have more fun watching thrifted denim blowing in the wind and air drying on a hot and humid day.
So, what's happened to me?
The real question is "What's happened to fashion?"
The wheels are falling off one by one, and I'm tucking and rolling before the fashion bus leaves the road.
So, will I continue to write about fashion?
Just remember that writing is my first love and fashion is just a side thing!
For women of color, none of us wants to be infected with the "crabs in the barrel" disease, or least we shouldn't be. We understand how difficult it can be to start your own business and watch it blossom into a success story. We also hope that our "sistahs" are not just only on the sidelines cheering but supporting us financially as well. As much as I would love to say that interacting with women like me has been profitable, reality has proved the opposite!
It's an age old question.
"Why won't Black people support Black businesses?"
Here's my story!
There's a Black owned and operated beauty supply store in my area and I refuse to shop there.
If I walk into an Asian owned beauty supply store, I will be greeted with at least a "Hello" even though they may watch me like a hawk to see if one of their products mysteriously disappears from the shelves. On both visits to the local Black owned store, I was not greeted at all. There wasn't a "Can I help you find anything?" In fact, the owner either stood silently behind the counter or talked to other customers leaving me to navigate the store on my own. Needless to say, I won't be returning; not even for $1.00 bag of elastic bands!
More recently, I made a point of searching for a Black beauty consultant for products that I needed. Google lead me to a consultant all the way in Washington DC and I was more than ready to spend my dollars with her. I was impressed with her business page, so much until I shared her information with three of my Facebook friends who are also interested in anti-aging and weight lost products. She seemed to be the perfect one until I had trouble placing my order and decided to wait until I was "in the mood" to try again. While waiting for the urge to return, I noticed a strange post on her page that read "Value doesn't beg!"
My intuition said that "shade" was being thrown at me, but I dismissed it until I had further evidence. I asked about the recent ingredient changes and informed her that I would need to sample the "new and improved" products before placing my order. Makes sense, right? Even though the products were reportedly even better than the old formula, my skin had to be the judge. I had to sample them first to see if I experienced any skin irritations.
After my inquiry on changes and needing new samples to test, "Boom", I was unfriended!
Now, that's not businesslike, is it?
Was I surprised?
The "sisters supporting sisters" idea is nothing more than a fantasy in my world!
Too much ATTITUDE and I don't pay for that!
So...I found an awesome consultant who just went out of her way to deliver my order and ALL of my future orders will be placed with her! Plus, I will be referring friends to HER as well!
Apparently, she knows her business or else she wouldn't be driving the company's Mercedes Benz!
But, is she a "sistah"?
And thank God for that!
Those cosmetic counter salespersons don't beat around the bush, do they? "Either you're going to make a purchase or you "gets nothin" here", they say. Hmmh? I don't exactly agree with their sales pitch but I can understand how it came to be.
Remember when you could go in for a free makeover, walk away and head straight to the nearest happy hour leaving the salesperson who works on commission with not a single penny extra added to to her paycheck? Well, you say, "It's not like she's all that busy and the samples are free so no harm done, right? Other than wasting her time, you make it really bad for those of us who really want to sample products with an intent to purchase and hopefully post a review.
I visited a cosmetic counter recently, and felt that I was being "eyed" by the beauty consultant. "She's judging me by my appearance.", I thought to myself. They do that, you know. Trying strolling in looking shabby with not an ounce of makeup on and watch them give you the cold shoulder. I was dressed in a super cute outfit, but my face was a MUA's worst nightmare. No primer, no foundation, no contouring! Just a plain faced over 50 woman with brows filled in with an eyebrow pencil, blue mascara, and lipstick. The end!
I asked about the anti-aging line and I'm assuming I passed the "Maybe she can afford it." test with my Chip & Pepper jeans and Madewell satchel, but when I mentioned Dove and aloe vera, I almost blew my chance of getting samples. I shared the details of our "National Teachers Appreciation Week" event and she casually said that I should see the store manager. After speaking with the manager and purchasing Loris a gift from the Brighton department, I returned to the makeup counter and the consultant was nowhere to be found.
She dipped. Poof! Gone! I wasn't leaving without waiting to see if she would reappear and sure enough, when she thought I had left the store, she came out from her hiding place. She seemed a little agitated by the fact that I was still there. Oh well. I did get a couple of samples that I absolutely love but she was sure to say "Come back for a makeover, but you have to buy something!"
Well, sister girl. I will be back, whenever you have a gift with purchase event...cause I don't need a makeover!
Aren't they bold?
I had my heart set on a nighttime anti-aging product, one that I was head over heels in love with many years ago. Then, other samples of free products came my way and I just couldn't resist the temptation to sleep around. Okay, I know it sounds a little sleazy but we're not talking multiple partners, but products used at night to help skin stay hydrated for a good night's sleep. Plus, nighttime is the right time for skin to go into repair mode and with the right serums and creams, our skin will look better in the morning,
So, now's the time to name names and put a few products on blast!
Arbonne RE9 Advanced anti-aging products never fails to give me that special glow but word has it that the products and the packaging have now changed and boasting even better results. We will have to see about that. Usually a "new and improved" means that a change may or may not agree with my skin, so I will be needing samples of the new stuff.
Estee Lauder Advanced Night Repair serum and Resilience Lift. This is definitely a face lift in a jar! The combination of the two supercharges your skin leaving it smooth and toned. These products are definitely in the race for a number one spot in my heart.
Silk'n Serum This serum is derived from natural oils found in olives which penetrates deep into the skin and leaves it soft and works wonders with the FaceFX anti-aging device.
ANEW Reversalist by Avon I received these products a couple of days ago and haven't had a chance to sample them yet, because I only have one face and that's not enough skin to go around especially with Mary Kay's TimeWise calling my name too!
This sleeping around is hard stuff and can be difficult to keep up with which product does what better than others but the important thing is that I have them all in my life and my skin is definitely benefiting from it.
So, who are you sleeping with?
I've got my armor on and ready for the anti-aging battle, but wait! Shouldn't I know what I'm going to war with before I fire the first shot?
Many of these products promise to diminish fine lines and wrinkles but whats the difference?
“Most dermatologists understand fine lines as being one to two millimeters in depth,” she explains. That’s about as thin, or even thinner, than a thread. These shallow folds are caused by lax, sagging skin and are associated with the earliest signs of aging or photo damage."
"Wrinkles are a bit more complex. Generally speaking, they are any lines that are deeper than 2mm. Wrinkles are predominantly caused by muscle contractions under the skin, which is why they show up were you make the most facial expressions, like squinting, frowning and smiling. Repeated facial muscle movements, contracting and releasing in the same way, over years create folds along those habitual lines. But, there are different types of wrinkles to understand as well. Dr. Gmyrek explains, “A dynamic wrinkle is a wrinkle that occurs only with movement. If you frown and you make that number eleven between your eyebrows, that’s a dynamic wrinkle. If you relax and that wrinkle stays, then you have a static wrinkle, or a a wrinkle at rest.”
When we figure out who we're fighting against, then we can plan our strategic war tactics accordingly.
Stay with Nappy Model Inc as Loris and I sample various anti-aging skincare products and share our results!
For more info, read here: https://www.charlottesbook.com/askcharlotte-difference-fine-lines-wrinkles/
My mom and I decided to shop America's Thrift Store this morning around 11:30 a.m. in hopes of beating the lunch hour traffic. Yes, women use their lunch hours to thrift for bargains and by my usual shopping hour, which is much later, all the goodies are gone! Little did we know that we were just in time for the action, a robbery, a china heist where the thief loaded the goods and pushed them right past the cashiers until one observant shopper (who needs a reward) spotted her and notified an employee.
So, it wasn't a good time for shopping as I didn't find a single thing that I could use, but the front seat view of the latter half of the heist was worth the trip. When I heard the call for management, I assumed it was for a price check, but when I saw two ladies rushing up the aisle, that meant trouble. I moved closer to the front of the store to see what the commotion was about and when I heard that someone had stolen some goods, that really grabbed my attention. Her car was pointed out and I went the window to get a description, light blue Honda CRV with license plate number 61DD**** driven by guess who...an elderly white woman (she had to be at least 65 years old or older with a head full of silver hair) and get this...she actually got away driving at a snail's pace!
So, I'm sitting back waiting for the nearest cop to nab her before she got outta sight, but what did I see...nothing but an old lady driving her china back to her booth at Bama Flea Mall. And just how did I get this information? Another shopper had been carrying on a conversation with the thief and she told her about the booth.
My question to management was "How did she gain access to the china when all of your expensive items are in or behind the showcase?" I then told them that it sounded like an inside job. My fellow shopper had more pertinent information. She witnessed one of ATS employees putting the dishes on the counter at the register nearest the showcase and the thief loaded them up and carried them away. Surely, that employee should have noticed...so, if she didn't...inside job, right?
Shouldn't old ladies be knitting, baking cookies, volunteering at the hospital, or watching soap operas? We will all pay for this theft which I'm told was around $400.00 and if you should see an old white lady with white hair driving a light blue Honda CRV with a booth at Bama Flea Mall, approach with caution!
What a day!
When I took a close look at my forehead, I couldn't believe what I saw. It wasn't just a couple of horizontal lines, it had the appearance of tic tac toe boxes and "scratch marks" we made as kids when learning how to count. Okay, life has gone too far. First, mid-life acne, slow growing hair, a couple of gray whiskers, weight gain, and now chicken scratch on my forehead! Unh-unh! I can't take any more!
Where did all these lines come from?
Aside from day to day stress, I realized that I brought a lot of this on myself. Not enough water, too much sugar, sleeping on my side instead of my back, squinting without sunglasses and my reading glasses. I can't blame it all on life. I brought a lot of these lines on myself! Now, it's time to put the aging skin in reverse.
I'm using the old "high afro puff" trick; using an elastic band (6 in a pack for $1.00 at the Dollar Tree) to create a temporary face lift, keeping my sunglasses and readers handy to avoid squinting, eating healthier, drinking more water, and best of all, I'm sleeping around. That's right, a different one every night if I choose...
Sleeping around for better skin!
Blog coming soon!
***If your mind is in the gutter, you should be ashamed!
I sold Arbonne around 2006 and it was short lived. I wasn't in it to supplement my income or earn a Mercedes because my salary was pretty good, good enough to buy own Mercedes...with cash at that. Still got that sucker too! She's aging beautifully, isn't she?
So, if I wasn't in it to win it, why did I become an Arbonne consultant? Well, after sampling the products, I fell in love and wanted to share it every woman that I knew. Problem was, I didn't have enough women in my circle and at that time, I wasn't on social media at all. Honestly, I knew nothing of Facebook and Twitter until recent years. I know. I know. Life under a rock, you say.
But, yeah. The products were awesome but pricey and my few customers couldn't afford to be "repeats." Fast forward to 2017 and I'm seriously looking to invest in an anti-aging line and Arbonne was the first product that came to mind. I joined a "What's Happening" group and asked if anyone knew of a consultant in the area and immediately I was in contact with someone. I asked for samples and was surprised to see that the samples for no longer the full sizes that we had in our startup kits way back then. There were these itty bitty samples (.1 fl oz) with barely enough product to bathe a gnat. I didn't tell her that I sold Arbonne years ago, because I didn't want to hear the old "Pure. Safe. Beneficial. Become a consultant" pitch. I wanted two sample packs, one for Loris and myself, but apparently these packets cost as much as a small diamond, because the consultant did not provide one nor promise to send one at a later time. She told me to try it for 3 days and then share my results.
When I began to use the products step by step, I noticed that the eye cream sample was empty. I notified her and you know what? She didn't offer to replace it and I was already beginning to think that she swapped it out and kept it for herself. Petty, right? Well, you guys know that I'm good at interrogations and in subsequent conversations, I discovered that the eye cream was her favorite. See? I was right! NO! I didn't NEED the eye cream. If I missed step, I wouldn't fall flat on my face, but a good salesperson would have provided a sample...I would!
After numerous messages back and forth, with my requests to get the products without having to pay tax, shipping, and a preferred client fee, plus contacting countless other Arbonne consultants with no response, I've decided to purchase through a consultant all the way from Washington DC. Yep, I sure am. I'm joining her team if she wants me to. And I'm sure that if I asked, she would send me an itty bitty eye cream sample that I really don't need. And honestly, if I changed my mind and didn't order Arbonne at all, I think I'll age beautifully anyways...like my car.
So, what's missing from Arbonne in my area...consultants who give a darn!